I am vulnerable...

These days, I am going through a very difficult phase in my life. A recent incident just showed me how vulnerable I am. During the past few weeks, I have put everything at stake... My life... my career... my relationship... my family. I just can’t believe in myself that I have been so stupid and foolish. In going through everything, I hurt the person who is closest to me, even though that person doesn’t have to do anything with it. I feel very guilty about myself. In my heart, I regret a lot of decisions I made in my life. I can’t turn back all those decisions... I am too far from that now... But from now on, I can only make it work better. Even though I feel I don’t have the courage to make things better, I know I must do so... as it will be good for me, my wife, my son, and my family. May Allah help me during this phase of my life.

Only Hope floats in deep end of Ocean...

There are moments in life when all you just need are a few words of affection; a slight assertion of hope; and a little appreciation, even though they are not meant and are coated with layers of lies. These small things can help you to move forward in life and give you courage to fight against the odds that you face in life. Sometimes all that you need is just one person who stands beside you, who believes in you and assures you that, in the end, everything will be fine; that person’s assurance that "All the obstacles and problems are transitory. If good times are not there, then surely bad times won’t last that long. A little hard work and patience are all that is needed. And in the end, it will make everything fine". This small piece of hope can do wonders in your life and help you achieve things you might not have even thought about. That small stone of hope transforms into a mountain of strength. Patience and believe that everything happens for a reason and it's only there to make you stronger so that you can value the reward at the end, which you will get.

I have seen people who are deprived of hope. They left things in the middle during difficult times in their lives. They don’t fight back for something of value and back out during such situations. Even when they are close to their destination, they quit their journey. I believe that each journey enriches our experience. It extends our limits beyond our own and others' imaginations and prepares us to achieve greater things. Times do change, and they change for the good. The best thing that one learns from difficult times is that the person discovers their ability to survive, and it makes one strong enough to deal with such situations in the end. In life, not everything goes according to what you had planned. But you can always try and struggle for it to make it work. And the right people always take something good from the unplanned things that life offers them, and they make them worthwhile by shaping them according to what they have planned. I have personally experienced a lot of such situations. I have failed a hundred times, but I have never let a failure drain my energy and hope. And with each failure, I have always learned something new, which has led me to a way of success which I had never planned.

Democra(c/z)y

I earlier thought that I would be voting for Imran Khan in the coming elections. But now I have decided I won’t be voting for anyone. It’s not like that I am in favour or against any particular political party or personality. It’s just that I do not support the idea of democrazy (democracy) anymore. I am very much against the idea of men ruling over men, whether in the form of aristocracy or democracy. Democracy is more suitable for welfare states where government officials have high moral values and have strict accountability. But in third world countries like Pakistan, where governments are corrupt and ruthless and people are divided into different sects, races, and castes, and where more than half of the population is illiterate, their minds are always occupied with earning enough to buy bread for their family at the end of the day. In such societies, democracy is greatly abused by powerful people. Meritocracy can be a good alternative, meanwhile, for such states.

2011: A year in review – Extending the Limits...

At the beginning of every year, I am in the habit of writing a post in which I highlight the important events of the previous year and the changes they made in my life. I couldn't do so for 2011. Since the beginning of this year, I have been very busy. Now, after more than 6 months, I have found an opportunity and I don’t want to stop this tradition. Let me start with my memories of 2011.

The year started with me and my wife shifting to Islamabad. I rented the ground portion of the house in the G10/4 sector. Its area was 5 marla (or may be less than that), and I was paying Rs. 18000 as rent, which was way less than the rent of other houses in the same area (as told to me). The house was definitely not worth it, but I didn’t have any other option and I didn’t want to live in guest houses anymore. We lived in that house for almost two and a half months, and then I went to Norway for one month. I had a skiing accident over there and got a brief concussion. Meanwhile, my sister from the UK visited Lahore. It was fun to spend time with her and her kids. In May, I had my firstborn. It was the happiest day of my life. I lived in a guest house for 2 months during that period in F8. Later that July, my family returned to Islamabad, and I rented a house at G11. It was a pretty nice place. In September, I got Australian immigration, and I started making up my mind about what I should do. Meanwhile, one of my really good friends lost his parents in a row, my brother got dengue, I had awful experiences at work and lost a friend at my workplace, and I have been travelling between Islamabad and Lahore back and forth. In November, I again visited Norway for the last time. During that trip, I got a job offer from an Australian company. I have decided to opt for that option. On my return, I resigned from Telenor and started preparing myself to face a new era in my life.

In short, if I conclude 2011, I will say it was a very hectic year for me because of all the travelling between cities, multiple relocations, and adjusting to a totally new city on my own. The good part was, in the end, it made me realise how far I could extend my limit. But if I ever come across a similar situation again, I think I will never again take decisions in that way in which I took them in 2011.

Happy life to you all....