Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost...

 These days I am fascinated and longing for one word. that is Sukh. انسان زندگی سکھ کی تلاش میں گزر دیتا ہے . مگر سکھ کیسے ، کب اور کہاں ملتا ہے ؟ سکھ کا احساس دِل کو بہت آرام دیتا ہے . زُبان سے نکلا  یہ لفظ دِل کو ٹھنڈک پہنچاتا ہے… چاہیے وہ گھڑی دو گھڑی کے لیے کیوں نا ہو . اِس زندگی میں مجھے بھی سکھ کی تلاش ہے . بچپن میں کہیں کھو گیا تھا یہ احساس . . پڑھائی میں ، ذمےداریوں کو نبھانے میں . . روزی کمانے میں . . خاندان کو پالنے میں . . جوانی کی ساری محنت اسی لیے ہے کہ بڑھاپا سکھ میں گزر سکے . . مگر سکھ تب بھی ملے گا کہ نہیں اِس کا مجھے معلوم نہیں . Dated: 27-Jun-2023

Okay, it is time for me to write something. I need to put my thoughts into writing. A few days ago, I watched Shahrukh's video in which he mentioned that he doesn't know how to make friends. This reminded me of my own experiences with friendships and the friends I have lost over time. I can completely relate to what he said because I also struggle with making friends. And even when I do make friends, I find it challenging to maintain those friendships for a long time. In dealing with friends, I have been quite immature. I have often abandoned my friends based on temporary emotions, without considering the long-term consequences. Sometimes, the pain caused by a friend hurts so deeply that it becomes hard to forget. It can take me years to heal from such hurt. Strangely, once I heal, I tend to forget the reasons behind the pain. Instead of trying to resolve conflicts with my friends, I have chosen to walk away from them. However, I am now realizing that this is not the right appr...

It's March 2023, and I realise I haven't written down my 2022 recollection. I was very consistent with my blogs in the last few months of 2022, but somehow, I forgot to write about 2022 itself. Allow me to begin. I began the year 2022 in Lahore. I took a leave of absence from work for 8–9 weeks. In my professional career, that is the longest work break I have ever taken. At the time, my brother and sister were also in Lahore. We hadn't seen each other in ages. We had some quality time together. During that trip, I made the decision to start building on my plot. My lifelong dream has been to own a home in Lahore. I employed an architect. Before deciding on the initial layout of my house, I visited several model homes. But then something bothered me. My wife informed me of a court case that I was previously unaware of. With that news, all the excitement of the trip vanished, and there were a few emotional breakdowns. One of my friendships(?) got broken. At least, I though...

I had the most ecstatic experience of my life the day before yesterday. 09-November-2022. Australia is currently hosting the T20 World Cup. The trophy is being contested by the world's top 12 cricket teams. This tournament was supposed to take place in Australia in 2020, but it was cancelled due to COVID. When the tournament was supposed to take place in 2020, I purchased tickets for one of the Pakistani matches, but they were refunded. In the first match of the 2022 T20 World Cup, Pakistan was narrowly defeated by India. Zimbabwe defeated them in the second match. They defeated the Netherlands in their third match. The fourth match was supposed to be held in Sydney. I decided to buy tickets 10 days before the game. It was a bit pricey, but I thought about having this experience. I couldn’t find all the tickets in the same row. So, I purchased tickets in two rows, front and back. The game took place on Thursday. We used public transportation to get to the stadium. I wasn'...

I was contemplating what makes me happy while taking my youngest daughter on our daily walk today. To be completely honest, I don't know what makes me happy. I'm still trying to decide if I'm a happy or sad person. I'm not a happy person, that much is certain. However, it also doesn't make me depressed. I don't have any sadness or depression. I have my bad days. There haven't been many occasions in my life where I can honestly say that I've been happy. The day my baby was born would rank as my happiest day. My memory remembers this specific moment. That was perhaps my happiest moment. When I was a child, meeting my cousins, indulging in junk food and sweets, and drinking Pepsi made me happy. I loved watching movies, going on rides, and reading good books. When I had good grades or moved up in the class, I could see it on my mother's face, and that made me happy. I don't remember any nice memories from my teenage years. My adolescence was not a go...

Yesterday and the day earlier, I was going through my blog. I proofread it, fixed grammatical mistakes, and paraphrased some sentences. I know I have stopped writing regularly and I can see long gaps in my writing. At times, I do feel like writing something, but I procrastinate. I need to be regular because when I go through my old posts, I realise how my life has shaped up over the years. How my thoughts, worries, and joys have changed over the years. How have I transformed over the years? Today I have limited time. I will try to complete this post instead of saving it in drafts only to be completed next year. I have just dropped my kids off at school and the youngest one is at day-care. My wife is at work, and I am at home, all alone. I must complete a solution pack by Friday, and I should be concentrating on it instead of my blog, but I want to write something. Reading my old posts yesterday, I realised how much my life has changed over the years. There has been a challenge in almo...